beauty healthy happy
14 Mar
White people and having a black child.?
The little girl is just so unhappy sins her siblings have well "easy hair" and dont look dry or unkept, she is aware of how she looks and how the other kids(black kids) look.
The little girl nagged about her hair to her mother and couple weeks ago she asked me if i could help her with the little girls hair which i dont mind teaching her but she actually has no interest in doing the child hair she just wants to pay me to do it.
She even asked me relax it so its "easier", i just said she is to young and she shouldn't relax here hair until she is like 16 or even older but definitely not younger then 16.
(black hair is beautiful and don't need to be relaxed in my view, but to each its own taste)
You should at least know that u wash it once or twice a week and that you use some good hair oil and take care of her scalp or at least know u don't wash it everyday with all kinds of hair shampoos.
Not to forget put some proper cream on the child's bodyI
she actually has manageable length of hair, i dont mind helping or even doing it but at least show some interest and attempt to do something about her hair and hair skin, she needs more cream and moisturizing on her hair and body then the other kids she has.
I braid,wash and take care of the child but this is something mum should be doing.(i babysit once in a while and at least do here hair once a week(she comes all by her self to me and asks me to and i feel bad saying no so just do it for her)
i have spoken to the mother and said if she wanted me to teach i could but she said no you just do it and all pay you.
I mean if you wanna adopt a black child with natural African hair then you should learn how to do it right as well as knowing that she isn't like her other kids and need extra cream ?
(please don't post any racist or offensive comment about black people and "black hair" or white people adopting none white childeren)
8 Responses for "White people and having a black child.?"
Maybe she thinks it is going to be really difficult for her to do it and is worried about doing it "wrong"?I think this is odd. I agree the mum should be looking to learn to do it herself, at least enough to look smart and tidy even if she doesn't want to do complicated styles. Is the little girl old enough for you to teach her to do it herself in an easy style?Maybe you can say right out to the mum "she needs x putting in her hair every day, this is where you buy it…" for the cream.
As she has other kids it may just be a time thing for her, having kids is hard work, (ok maybe she should of thought of that before taking on another child with hair that would need looking after) Just let her pay you and you can teach the girl to look after her own hair, she will at least have that knowledge forever then.
I completely agree with you. Hair is a sense of pride and the time spent having the hair done is a great bonding time between mother and child. If you don't have time to do hair then maybe you already have too many kids. I am white, I have an African American son, he has alopecia and lost all his hair for many years .. he just has a few strands and I shave his head everyday. ( he is very delayed and unable to shave himself) I also have to use cream on his skin daily. The extra time it takes to keep his skin and him looking good is our time together. When I did foster care I did African hair on many of my girls and my friend's foster children. It isn't difficult to learn. I can braid , twist and corn row and really enjoy doing it. It would be nice if the mother would take the time to learn but at least the girl has you as a mentor.
We adopted African children as well. I have been very grateful for all the help we got from friends about proper skin and hair care. I agree completely: it IS important and it IS different than caring for a Caucasian child's skin and hair. I will say that there is no way I could learn to braid my daughter's hair (tight microbraids) the way that she likes and I do take her to a stylist that does braids.I do think that this girl's mother does need to learn how to do some things: especially using good cream and hair washing. (Yes, the stuff you buy in the grocery store isn't good enough cream!) And I agree with your statement about relaxing hair. I think it's one thing for an to make a decision to relax her own hair, another thing for white adoptive parents to decide to straighten their daughter's hair. If she isn't understanding what kinds of cream and shampoo she should be getting, there are some online references that give some great suggestions on what kinds of product to buy and where to get them. I'm sure this is also overwhelming for her. Also, you could make some suggestions as to a style (like micros) that can be left in for longer and easier to care for on a daily basis. I think it's great that you are willing to help and I remember feeling very overwhelmed when I was first learning these things! Source(s): AP
I agree with donna and think it may be a time thing as she has other children. Just charge her andmake enough money to make the child up a basket with the lotions, oils and creams she needs totry it at home with.Maybe as time goes on, the mom with take it upon herself to actually learn what the child`s hairneeds and learn off of the girl what to do.
i think your right, if your going to adopt an african, african american child a mixed child or have a mixed child of your own you should take the time to learn how to handle the hair. I myself if were ever to adopt i would from africa, and i would definetly learn how to dot he childs hair. I absolutely hate it when i see white people with children of color and there hair is a downright mess. also as of right now if i were to marry the man i am with we would have mixed children and i would be sure to learn how to handle the childrens hair. I just think its not the hardest thing in the world to do for your child so they dont have to look like that. it especially not fair when you have white children in the home too and there hair is taken care of and the child of color isnt taken care of. it also should not be your responsibilty to care for her hair either, but i think it is very nice of you to do so for the girls sake.
i think you are being judgemental.do you imagine what itis to take care of 4 kids? doing hair takes time,that she probably doesn't have so let her pay you and maybe teach the little girl instead.I imagine for you it is easy to do her hair because your mum or someone teached you since you were a kid but none of the mum or the girl ever done it
Tell her you are willing to teach her (the mom) how to do her daughters hair. Tell her its important for her to understand how to do her own daughters hair because you are not going to be always available to do it and also even tho she is paying you it isn't your job to do her child's hair (unless you want it to be ). I think if you explain this to her she will (hopefully) understand and she will wlt you teach her how to do her daughters hair.
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