Reflection…
I look in the mirror and what do i see?
a sad, fat, figure staring back at me,
I look again and then look once more
and it apeared to me that it was my reflection i saw.
I did not recognise her at first glance
but she copied my movements when i started to dance
i raised one hand, as did she
then i wiggeled my leg and again she copied me.
It was here when i realised that i was being reflected
and at the same time i was being rejected
my body grew cold and brought a tear to my eye
and with another glance i started to cry…
The image in the mirror just stopped and starred
not even my reflection was willing to care…
she laughed in my face and called me names
she pin pointed faults in my body frame.
I watched myself raise a hand to stomache
i sucked it in tight, but still i panicked
my fingers trembelled as i tugged at my skin
and i wished and wished that i could be thin.
I will never be perfect, of that i am sure
and within a second, i ran out the door
in the kitchen, i picked up a knife
started slitting and slicing to try end this cruel life
people will wonder, they will ask why?
but they never knew that alone i would cry!
to them i was fine, just an ordanary girl
but every day was a battle up in my own world
i never thought i would comit suicide
but the day i found peice was the day that i died
all the stress, all the pain, all the lies and confusion
all the descete, all the fails and all the delusion
its all gone now, it was all in my head
and for a long while now, i was already dead
the voice in me that ordered perfection
was the monster named 'ana' and she was my reflection.