I'm bored lol, so i made a fake journal entry..what do you thinK?

Never have I realized the intensity of my hideousness. I’ve been hiding it from myself so long, I’ve been tucking my inner but outer thoughts away, denying what I see in the mirror. How could I have been so foolish? The size of my nose, my asymmetrical droopy eyes, my female moustache, my body! How dare I say I’m cute and how dare they say I’m beautiful! They’re nothing but liars, accountable for the fluctuation in my slowly dying self esteem. I’ve cried so many times, so many nights and days I have wished and longed to be beautiful. So many times I have thought I was beautiful, but my pictures and my boy’s attention scale are starting to tell me otherwise. I am becoming miserable and the thought of me being beautiful seems so far fetched. It’s impossible for me to ever be gorgeous and now it seems damn near impossible for me to be cute. I am cursed with the features of a man, my father, who’s not here and who happens to resemble an ogre. My mother is beautiful with long, curly, shiny, beautiful hair with chestnut brown eyes that hide between thick framed glasses and a body shape that is the envy of many. Her features compliment each other, her keen nose and normal shaped eyes and lips sit quietly and daintily on her smooth tanned skin. I on the other hand, am not a person of physical beauty. My skin is covered with acne and my acne grows as if it’s on steroids. The scars on my face are round and hideous, small but abundant, and growing by the day. My hair is dry and nappy and now is choppy because of a bad haircut. My forehead is wide and big, a sure place for pimples to come and go, leaving behind their marks of pubescent injustice. My eyebrows are thick, like hairy arms that extend across my pimple written forehead. My eyes are slanted and brown and appear to be half way open. Unfortunately, my left upper eyelid seems to be weaker than than the other, so it hangs closer to my lower eyelid, giving me the lazy eye appearance. My nose is prominent, giving me the appearance of a Samoan man. Pimples seem to travel across my broad forehead and occasionally land on my huge, round, flared nose and stay there, causing me major embarrassment that not even makeup can conceal. My lips are small and dark pink and seem to be the only normal thing on my face. Above my decent lips are small tough follicles of hair that persevere through sharp razors and waxing. My chin, like the rest of my face, is covered in bumps. My cheeks are wide and unattractive and they give the appearance of having Braille on my face. If a blind man were to walk up to me, he would probably be reading, “ugliest chick alive.” From my neck down harvests extra fat that is holding on and staying strong like my upper lip hair.. I’ve exercised, ate healthy, and I’m still as thick as a regular buffet goer. I’m quite unhappy with my appearance and I should stay that way until I’m a sight of beauty. I will be beautiful, I will be wanted, I will be loved. I tell myself this but goodness knows this transformation from an ugly duckling to a beautiful swan is going slow. I want to be beautiful! That’s all I ask for, that’s all I want.