I don't know what i'm suppost to do or think anymore?
I'm 17 and male.
i've been told by many people that i have ADD because i have a short attention span
I think i have some kind of anxiety disorder and i also think i have Depression.
I feel really low and completly uninterested with life. I don't have a clue what i'm going to do in terms of a job, I don't have any aspirations in life and no real interests. I don't really care about anything at all. I play on my Xbox all day because it's the quickest way to get through the day.
I'm quite a private person and i have a huge problem with trusting people. Everyone is out there for themselves and will stab you in the back to get what they want. I just can't trust anybody, not even my family. Every time someone leaves the room i always have thoughts about what they're doing. most of the time i manage to distract myself from these thoughts but the point is i have them.
I'm a bit of a hermit and i stay in my house most of the time the only time i leave my house is when i go to school or when i go to my dad's. I like to keep a low profile in places that i feel uncomfortable in (which happens to be almost everywhere). I don't hang around with my mates, because i don't even trust THEM!!!!!
When i do decide to go out of my house, i have really horrible thoughts. Basically they're "what if" thoughts and the bad thing is they're always negative thoughts.
For example. I was walking near my house and i saw a truck and thought "what if that truck blew up". I then got horrible images of it exploding and bits of it flying everywhere and people getting killed. These thoughts happen to me when i'm indoors, but most of the time it happens outdoors. Sometimes when i walk past someone i get it into my head that they are going to do something and i get a bit freaked out. To take my mind off these negative thoughts i count random things like buildings or i add up the numbers on car licence plates. When i'm outside i try my hardest to avoid any cracks in the pavement. I'm quite claustrophobic and i hate people touching me. I'm also really impatient and i'm very easily irritable. I'm a very anxious person constantly panic and get worked up about things. I get really nervous sometimes and i bite my lip and chew my fingers. I have bitten my lip until it's bled multiple times, i've also bitten my fingers until they've bled. Once i was so nervous and anxious that i got my arm and i scrapped it with my teeth until i realised i'd broke the skin.
When i'm trying to get to sleep, i usually get scary thoughts about dying and about scary creatures and i get so freaked out. I then distract myself from these thoughts by sorting things out ,like my DVDs, and put them in order or make them symmetrical or alphabetise them.
I feel like i'm about to just cave in and have a huge breakdown.
I don't even know when all this started.
I'm not really an emotional person, and i try not to share my feelings with others, but i just needed to share them with someone and i'd prefer it to be someone i don't know, rather than my parents or my doctor. That's why i've written all this,
What do you think my problem is?
What disorder/disorders do you think i may have?
Why am i so messed up at 17
3 Responses for "What do you think is wrong with me?"
Best Answer – Chosen by Voters heyya,i'm not a doctor, but i'm guessing that you've just got depression and a few anxieties in life. i'm not sure about the ADHD, you didn't really mention any symptoms. i certainly don't think that you're messed up, or have any major mental disorders. many people feel like you, you just need to make some changes in your life, and maybe speak to a therapist or a friend to talk through your trust issues with people. when your anxiety is coming to the point where you're self-harm, that's when you need to look for some help (which is exactly what you're doing so well done!)you might not be particularly keen about this idea, but i'd think through the idea of going to see a doctor to ask to be referred to a therapist or counsellor to help you work through the issues, they may also prescribe you some medication if your happy with that and they think it would help.i really hope things get better for you, and feel free to email me if you have any questions or need someone to talk to. i have experience with this kind of thing myself, so i know how your feeling.
The part I'm most worried about is scrapping your arm.
Oooh OCD. Go to the doctor and talk to them about CBT.There are a lot of us out there, we all know those "what if?" problems. Before you do anything else, go to an online OCD support group and read what other people are experiencing, then you'll really, really know you are not alone.I would see a psych though, of course you are entering the danger range for mental illness to surface and worries about people being out to get you can be signs of that, but I'm betting this is ocd that's been uncontrolled for a long time, that has messed you up. It can be fixed.
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