I REALLY REALLY hate my nose, can someone help?

Ok I am a 16 year old girl and I really really hate my nose. And I don't mean it's too big or something. I mean I hate the fact that i have a perfect face and this big thing sticking out of my prefect face. I think I could achieve pure beauty if I cut it off or something. But the problem is if I cut it off i'm afraid some of the skin around my nose might be scarred and I won't have a perfect face. So I was thinking that I get someone, like a homeless guy or something to drug me and beat me with a bat in the nose while i'm asleep. Hopefully the surgeons won't be able to repair it and they will have too cut it off. My parents will of course offer to pay for a new nose but I will selflessly insist that they don't spend there retirement money on me. Good plan? Or does someone have something better?