i feel disgusted with myself?
Author: admin
26
Mar
Undecided Question
I feel disgusted with myself?
i really do, and i'm getting depressed over it. i looked back at some of my old pictures, and i'm getting pretty angry. i had lots of thick, long hair and beautiful skin. my hair's now thin and brittle and breaks so easily. i don't even have as much hair as i used to. my skin is disgusting, i break out randomly and it's probably because i get stressed with not enough sleep. it's also getting red on the front cheeks. i also have dandruff, disgusting i know. my mom used to put hairspray all over my hair and i think that's one of the causes why my hair's so disgusting now. i also have two red patches above my forehead attached to my scalp. i have no idea how to get rid of them as i've had them since about forever. my nose is bulbous. it's round and meaty. i do believe my nose is actually really small without all the excess skin covering it. i hate the creases on the side of my nose. it just looks like something's trying to dig in the side of my nose. i also absolutely hate the pores on my nose and the pores all over my face. i break out with multiple zits at once. i don't know why. the foods i eat are not oily at all. i'm perfectly healthy, yet i'm overweight. i've never had problems with diabetes, cholesterol, or high blood pressure. i do second hand smoke ever since i was born since my dad's since he was 21 and now he's 59. i have bags and wrinkles on my eyes from lack of sleep. even when i do sleep enough, they still appear. i put cucumbers on my face to get away the wrinkles but it's not even working. one of my dimples are deep and one of them aren't deep enough. i'm just really sad with my face and my excess weight.
i exercise, eat healthy, and i eat less calories than the recommended amount. to me, breakfast only makes me gain more weight so i don't eat it. also, the parts on my body that are flapped, like my neck is dark. i clean it everyday in the shower. i clean it every morning with rubbing alcohol. it isn't getting any better. i have so many things to worry about in my life from school to my nails being too wide so i can't even draw my designs on it right. my vision is also terrible… i have contacts and they make me rub my eyes, which might lead to me getting wrinkles. i'm 5'4 the last time i checked, and i don't feel comfortable telling my weight. i'm absolutely in love with cosmetics but i never wear any.
someone give me tips on how to make myself better? i don't believe in that "beauty is only skin deep" type of thing.
2 Responses for "i feel disgusted with myself?"
Well the way i make myself beautiful is i wear makeup. I use foundation and concealer on my face to cover up any red spots. And makeup to cover up baggy eyes, i heard that putting spoons in a freezer then applying them on your eyes takes away the bags. Thats the only way i can think of, just believe in yourself and believe that you are beautiful. Nobody is perfect after all, even the most beautiful people are not perfect.
There have been times when I have actually missed college and parties because i've been convinced that people will run away from me like I'm something from a horror movie, all because of my wretched skin. I never have just one spot at a time, I get loads, and it always seems to coincide with bad hair days, bad clothes days….urgh…but you have to realise that no-one else sees it the same way you do. I would die if I didn't have foundation and concealer to help cover everything up. Yeah, my bad skin is still ridiculously noticeable to me…now I have to worry about beige scabs and bumps everywhere…but it really does help to stop me feeling like I can't leave the house. If you do this, and perhaps wear some of the other makeup you like (eyeliner, mascara etc) it should hopefully boost your confidence a little bit. Concealer would also be good for covering the rashes on your head and any dark eye circles.As for your hair, just try using an anti dandruff shampoo, supermarkets do really cheap own versions. It probably isn't anything to do with the hairspray, it's more likely to be caused by hormonal changes that can easily turn lovely moisturised hair into nasty dry hair in a short space of time! Chin up xx
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