beauty healthy happy
15 Mar
Honest opinion please! What do you think of these lyrics?
(Please don't say that you like it just to be voted best answer, say what you really think. lol)
If you have any tips or ideas, let me know
I don’t understand…
The way I still long, for the touch of your hand.
I’ve been hurt too many times before,
Said I was through,
But you keep coming back,
Knocking on my door…
And I let you in.
Well, I’m not gonna let you win again.
What happened to my confidence,
Why are you acting innocent,
When you’re the one that did this to me…
You’ve tried to play these games before,
But I can’t take it anymore…
What happened to my pride?
I’m starting to believe your lies…
And oh,
When did I become,
The insecure one?
You seemed so perfect,
That I was ashamed…
But who said that means you can beat me down?
I only have ONE name.
Beauty’s only skin deep, you didn’t pass the test.
It’s time for me to move on,
You never cared about the rest.
What happened to my confidence,
Why are you acting innocent,
When you’re the one that did this to me…
You’ve tried to play these games before,
But I can’t take it anymore…
What happened to my pride?
I’m starting to believe your lies…
And oh,
When did I become,
The insecure one?
I need time to find myself again,
You need to go,
I don’t wanna stay friends.
You tried to keep me under your spell,
All I have to say,
Is you can go to hell!
What happened to my confidence,
Why are you acting innocent,
When you’re the one that did this to me…
You’ve tried to play these games before,
But I can’t take it anymore…
What happened to my pride?
I’m starting to believe your lies…
And oh,
When did I become,
The insecure one?
3 Responses for "Honest opinion please! What do you think of these lyrics?"
I honestly love the lyrics and how at the end you just tell them to go to hell! It sounds like they really broke you down and you started believing in the lies, but deep down you had the courage to say enough is enough and you were going to build yourself back up, give yourself new life and they weren't going to be in it.The only part I question is "You seemed so perfect, That I was ashamed…". I just didn't understand that line, but maybe it's just me and I need to look into it more. Otherwise the lyrics are great and I love the way it flows together.Two thumbs up!
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their good
To my unprofessional eye, it seems like you rhymed only when it suited you. Drink deeply or not at all is my motto. If you want to even out the rhythm of the verse, read some simple Shakespeare verses to get the feel for it. Always go to the top!It has emotion, which is great, and could become quite catchy with some polish on it.Try putting it away for three days with out looking at it (hard, I know) then read it through with new eyes. Go with your first reaction to it, that is the true one. This is advice I read from Leonardo Da Vinci, the maestro, it worked for his artistic genius, should work for you too.don't stop writing! Source(s): Unpublished lyricsist.
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