College essay help, a story of my life?

1. Discuss how your family's experience or cultural history enriched you or presented you with opportunities or challenges in pursuing your educational goals.

- OR -
2. Tell us a story from your life, describing an experience that either demonstrates your character or helped to shape it.

Moving to Seattle from my mother’s native country of Japan was a traumatic experience for me as a five-year old boy. My parents decided to move to this country because they wanted me to be educated in English, the international language, and were confident that I would get a better education in the US. The Japanese have a rigorous academic structure, but it does not foster creativity and development of the artistic and critical mind. I am very glad that my parents made this decision for my sister and I, but I did not always feel this way. Upon my arrival, I had a very hard time adjusting without being able to speak English. The experience of immersion in a new culture, where I now looked different from many of my classmates and did not speak their language, was very stressful for me. Shortly after arriving, I became autotoxemic and was constantly sick. Even after a year in preschool, when I entered elementary school I was put in a bilingual program to improve my English. It was difficult for me to communicate in English with my teachers and classmates, and I did not begin to feel comfortable in America until the end of my kindergarten year.
As I began to cope with new challenges set forth, my surroundings became very clear to me. Because of my differences, I was always a very shy young boy. Instead of conversing, I would stand in the backdrop and observe. When I reached an age old enough to understand racial differences, I felt the need to convince myself that I was somebody else. I now believe that being bi-racial, bi-cultural, and bi-lingual is a special thing, but as a child I just wanted to fit in.
It was not just my Japanese background that made me feel different. All of my friends were very well off and had very nice homes, whereas my family has still never owned a home. They were all fun, loving, and exciting families, and all I saw was the color of their skin, white. I did not know why I was different, but I knew that I loathed the fact that I was. Little did I know that my diversity was shaping me into the person that I would someday be proud of.
I did not experience racial teasing until I became a teenager, and did not know how to react to it. Playful racism among friends and even acquaintances developed into a frequent theme. I tried my best to play along and not feel offended because after all, only half of me was being laughed at. Yet somehow I was getting the impression that I was perceived as a lesser human being. I have slowly moved away from those who think different of me because of my racial representation.
I have been successful in American culture, being a good student, playing sports, and having a wife circle of friends. I teach chess and soccer to children, and am active in student government. My experience in two cultures has helped me in working with children from a variety of backgrounds. I am now very happy that my parents brought me to the United States. And yet, when I traveled independently to China and Japan this summer, for the first time I felt like I belonged. Although I was in Hong Kong where the majority speaks Cantonese, the cultural difference did not alarm me as it did when I first came to America. I quickly became enamored with the beauty of the Asian culture infused with the effects of British colonialism. I wanted to embrace the culture as my own, become a part of its inner-workings. In Tokyo as well, I sensed the same sort of acceptance that I longed for back in the states. I met a number of brilliant, successful, and genuine people that helped me to find what I was searching for. My entire life I had been contemplating the reoccurring question of whether or not I was accepted for my racial differences, when in fact all I desired was for acceptance of myself as a contributing member of this society.

What do you guys think?