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Any Thoughts On My Poem?
Author: admin26 Mar
Any Thoughts On My Poem?
DIAMONDS & SNOWFLAKES
Exaggeration of the mess you’re in
Blaming it all on me
Trying and lying to cut my skin
To drag me, unwillingly
You laugh and cheer the chaos free
You break what you can’t fix
Why do you suppose it will end with me?
Does my panic fuel your kicks?
Tumbling down towards the truth inside
Your infinite vertical drop
Stumbling miles of a rising black tide
This theatrical disaster must stop
I’m not afraid of your sterile schemes
It’s funny how you cannot realize
I could slip away, dissipate your dreams
But your screams keep me satisfied
You don’t go well with me, I know
You’re misshapen and confused
Like diamonds and snowflakes
All beauty can be abused
Well, there ya go? Please leave a comment, i'd love to hear some of your thoughts!
xo
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- Car insurance through your drivers license? Is it possible?
- What's do you pay for car insurance in your country?
- Do you think I'm going to have to buy car insurance for my rental?
- Can i repair my car's old dent with new insurance?
- Good car insurance for underage driver with an accident record?
- Is it possible to pause a car insurance but resume it again?
- Who pay the car insurance for deaf driver monthly?
- How do you try to buy or bid on totaled vehicles by car insurance companies?
- how do i sue someone who doesnt have car insurance?
- Is there anyway to avoid paying my 1000 dollar deductible on my Car Insurance?
- I am trying to get car insurance, but the car I drive is someone else's?
- Do you need to be on the car insurance to drive a car you borrowed from someone?
- can I get car insurance without having a vehicle listed on the policy?
- What's the cheapest car insurance company you have found??
- Who can stand for my car insurance besides my mom?
- Can I make a payment online for my car insurance?
- Where can I get really cheap car insurance?
- what happens when you pay your car insurance late?
- Do you add your kids under your car insurance ?
- Is personal car insurance effective while driving at work..?
- How much will the insurance company give me back for my car?
- where can we get car insurance for only one week?
- Do car insurance companys check your driving record?
- what is best car insurance and how easy is it to get over the phone?
- how much would car insurance be for a 16 or 17 yr old guy?
- Is there anyone who thinks that car insurance is a ripoff?
- Is it possible to stay under my moms car insurance plan if I get my own place?
- How can a non BC resident be on a car insurance (ICBC)?
- does the car insurance charge extra more for adding a teen driver under 18?
- What type of car insurance do you use and why?
- How do you find out which car insurance you had years ago?
- Is the analogy to heath insurance and car insurance a bit absurd?
- Will car insurance company check for air bags?
- How much is car insurance for international under age drivers to rental car?
- What happens if you don't get car insurance?
- In NY, do you have to have Car Insurance even if your not driving?
- How much would a person pay for car insurance?
- what are people paying per annum for car insurance in Alberta?
- Is there anyway I can get a citation not to go on my car insurance?
- what is the best but cheapest car insurance for 23yr old guy in Florida?
- What state and city in USA has the lower rates for car insurance please?
- do you need car insurance to rent a car in MA?
- Do any states not require car insurance by law?
- can i sell a car if i dont have updated registration and insurance?
- car insurance to get my registration unsuspended?
- How much does car insurance cost?
- Am i paying too much for car insurance?
- Why do car insurance rates go up?
- Has anyone had any negative experiences with Geico car insurance in Arizona?
- what happens if you stop paying car insurance?
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8 Responses for "Any Thoughts On My Poem?"
My honest opinion? I think your poem speaks volumes. I love it and give it an A. With just a little tweak, an A+. You have a gift with words and just a little tweak will make you even better.As I'm reading, the poem flows nicely till I get to the 3rd stanza and the line-"This theatrical disaster must stop" There seems to be too many syllables. It's like I tripped and fell down over all 7 syllables in "theatrical disaster". Another trip in the 4th stanza with the word "cannot". Shorten it to can't and it flows.Almost done, hold on—–add another word to the last line of the poem. Something with 4 syllables. Either 2 words with 2 syllables or a big one with four.Remember, I said I loved it! LOL
This poem is about a volatile relationship in which one person is sick of the abuse and neglect of their partner. They know that they need to get away however for the sake of not being alone, they stay in the relationship. How was that?
I really like it 8/10. Just my style of poetry.Still room for improvement though, I have no advice for you but with more practice you will perfect it.
Very good
Needs work.
wow. i ?.
thats kool.. btw great vocab =]
Really awesome! You got one hell of a talent there! I think it means that the protagonist feels tortured by the hate that surrounds him/her but that he/she holds a secret that could be used against the people who like to hate him/her. That it's not really the protagonist that is being tortured, but the torturers that torture because they are afraid. I think. I sure hope I'm getting this right. I have an amazing ability to read what I want to hear in poems, so I might be totally off.
In either case though, you use powerful words. I love this poem!
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